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"i am free to be who i really am... no pretenses, no broken promises, no fear... just a life packed with hopelessness and unattainable dreams, 'cause im just livin' like i shld... my life..." everyone has hopes and dreams but dun they know that hope is the denial of reality and that dreams will forever be just dreams?

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Sunday, April 30, 2006

[300406] Crash N Burn

Ever felt that life was like a never ending cycle of routines, routines and more routines? Im begining to feel more and more like this... work, sleep, work, sleep, work, sleep... on and on it goes, you get the idea... woke up at close to 1300 hrs and got gently reminded that i had to work at 1730 hrs which means i had to leave the house by 1630, great just great... the time's already 1415, less than 2 hours plus to go before work again.. *groanz*

First time i worked on a saturday afternoon/opening shift... geez, imagined being slammed during the day... sickening thing was i did the opening of the alfresco area all by myself again, got my entire uniform drenched in perspiration... and later when we were slammed, only Ryan (pronounced as Ree-an) were the only ones stationed at alfresco serving ONLY 14 tables full of unhappy, impatient, typical fucked up Singaporeans with their attitude. What's this attitude u might ask? "I pay money so I fucking big fuck. Im a paying customer"

Oh fuck off... typical airheads, too bad u cant exactly buy intellegience or common sense... the Bar is swamped with orders and im sure you guys are not blind to see that the entire outlet is full. Full of hungry, thirsty fuckers much like yourself except that they're much more understanding, patient, takes time to smile and nod at us and they're WAY better looking than you are. Come to think about it, the only table that sat fuckers was yours! Im sorry.. my bad my bad...

Was darn relived when Heikel gave me the okay to stop work... woo hoo!! Slacked around the outlet reading newspaper and helped the night crew buy their chow and get myself fed in the process as well... slacked til around 2030 hrs then proceeded to walk around Carrefour before meeting Terence at Raffles.

Newcastle played like shit yesterday... all the hard work from the past 5 games all came to nought as we brew with the Coca-Cola Championship bound brummies 0-0, Bramble had a glorious chance to win the game but he instead chose to shoot the ball at the fucking keeper when all he had to do was pass it to his right for nobby to slot the ball home.. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!!!! Worst thing is that Blackburn won 2-0 meaning to say, we're now 2 points behind them and we've played one more game... Really hope bolton loses against Hotspurs... they have two games in hand... darn... really need to get a result against Chelski at SJP next week... as impossible as it may seem...

Met up with my brudders on friday night, Black and monk came back from Taiwan already and Fox and JJ were both free... met up for a quick dinner before heading to slack at where else but starbucks. hmm.. I protest!!! Starbucks is maintaining an unhealthy monoploy in Yishun whereby if i want to drink 'gourmet' coffee, i have no place to go other than Starbucks or i have to settle for the 60 cent kopi at 925. Perhaps the Worker's Party that's challenging Assoc. Professor Ho Peng Kee should make this a cornerstone in their election Rallies... chuckles.

Had Chong Pang nasi lemak for supper... still tasted as good as the first time i ate there (my second time i had Chong Pang nasi lemak by the way... lol) The fried chix wing - solid, the chilli - to die for... overall - SEDAP man... *droolz* then proceeded to chat and just tcs and catch up... My wife who's in the SAF and my mother's daughter???

ROFLMAO

achem, my bad.. inside joke..

turion at 14:14

Friday, April 28, 2006

[280406] A little ego stroking

http://damien.youaremighty.com/

haha... hilarious, ok lah, the Damien mentioned was damiEn not damiAn but both sound the same right? I can conquer anything?!? No mortal can deter me? erm.. OOOoooKkkkk... anyways, thanks Hendrick for the good laugh and erm... morale booster?

AND FOR THE LAST TIME, MY NAME IS SPELLED d a m i A n not E n!!!!! Geez, and i figured you guys would have at least known that or remembered by now... and no, it's not read as Da Mian (Chinese meaning big noodles) or da pian or any other funny stuff i've heard over the years and my chinese name is He Yu (not river rain, river fish, river jade)... sheesh... grow up already...

nahz, not really complaining.. just finding stuff to blog about.. haha..

turion at 00:49

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

[250406] Repeat after me, S-L-A-M-M-E-D

slam

1. To shut with force and loud noise: slammed the door.
2. To put, throw, or otherwise forcefully move so as to produce a loud noise: slammed the book on the desk.
3. To hit or strike with great force.
4. Slang. To criticize harshly; censure forcefully.


as quoted from www.dictionary.com

Ladies and gentlemen, please repeat after me. S-L-A-M-M-E-D. Please refer to the text above for the exact meaning and after point four, i would like to add the fifth meaning of slammed.

5. Slammed. The time when you run around like mad, cursing, swearing in all manner of vulgarities (in our minds only, of course... afterall we are in the F & B line... service quality my friends!) all the while maintaining a smile and politely asking the guests, "Evening Sir/Ma'am, what can I get you? / How can I help you? / Would you like to refill your ice water?"

Sheesh, i hate being slammed on weekdays nights... think it's the 2nd or 3rd time i've worked on a weekday night and we kenna slammed... well, the outlet closes at 2230 and usually we take our last orders at 2200 and finish everything by 2300. BUT tonight, we were at full house as we approached 2200 and by the time we asked for last orders, it was already our "supposed" closing time... by the time we started clearing up and started the washing, it was already close to 2300.. jeez... dun these people have to work tomorrow??


Working again tomorrow... haha.. 1500 - 2300, shiokness... closing again.. haha... oh well.. it's for the money... and it's kinnda fun though sometimes it becomes darn frustrating.. haha.. 0108 hrs now... one and a half hours to go before villareal arse match... come on you Arses! win the worthless yellow subs, i wanna see Ronaldinho and Co. kick the shit out of your Arse (pardon the pun) in the Champions' League Final in Paris...

turion at 00:57

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

[250406] Ka-ching! Ka-ching! Ka-ching!

Recieved my first pay for working today though i was abit (ok, ok... i was extremely disappointed) at the amount i recieved.. turned out today's pay was for working between 24th March to 7th April.. DAMN!, and it's the pay without the meal allowance DOUBLE DAMN!! and it's so much lower than what I had anticipated TRIPLE DAMN!!! plus next pay gonna have CPF deduction *groanz*

Darn... quite pitiful... only slightly more than twice my former weekly allowance... hmmm.. have to last me til the next payday... a significant moment today... the day I gain financial independence... *chest swells with pride* erm.. ok lahz... abit late to gain my financial independence at the age of 21 but at least i've lifted another piece of burden off my mum's back... she'll stop giving me allowances from now on....

Bills - Pay myself
Makan - Pay myself
Transport - Pay myself
Entertainment - Pay myself
Any other irrelevant / relevant costs associated with me - Pay myself

In summary... i'll have to watch the purse strings damn closely... seen a lot of instances of my brudders being crushed by temporary poverty... when they used up their NS pay... im wary of falling into that pit... but sometimes, it's hard i guess especially nowadays i seem to have the mentality of "Aiyah, working now mahz, can lahz.. can splurge a little..." tsk tsk tsk... die man...

2 new additions to the AT crew... Full timer Tini and Part Timer Elene... both seemed to be easy going and friendly enough... feeling quite settled at TCC now... more or less in tune with what to do and stuff and the staff's a pretty decent, rowdy and friendly bunch of people all rolled into one.. more or less like when i was working at CBTL.... just that more things to do and more stress with the table service and stuff... i think my fuse's quite short these days especially when working outdoors when kenna slammed, my mood changes drastically... had 4-6 ppl all asking me if was ok last saturday night when i was working.. of course im not ok.. frustrated lahz, angry lahz... wanna scream, shout and tear my head out...

Looking forward to meeting up with the lads this sat for the Brums game... i've missed all the matches since the west ham victory and damn, keep missing the games that we've played brilliantly and im especially knocking myself for the missing the game against Sunderland!!! Why didnt they show that game???? King Al's last ever game in the black and white strip and we missed it ALL!!! Sighz... the end of a grand era... slightly concerned about who's gonna be coming and going.. such a mist of uncertainty surrounding St James Park.. oh well, i hope it clears soon... UEFA CUP, here we come!!

HOWAY THE LADS!

turion at 01:14

Thursday, April 20, 2006

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Physical Touch
with a secondary love language being
Quality Time.

Complete set of results

Physical Touch: 11
Quality Time: 9
Receiving Gifts: 4
Words of Affirmation: 4
Acts of Service: 2


Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

turion at 11:38

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

[180406] Take the Lead Never Follow

Caught Take the Lead earlier on, hmmm... decent film... not too bad i would say though i was mistaken by the trailer itself... had elements of hip-hop in it but not as much as i anticipated, the main focus of the movie itself was of course the ball room dancing but surprisingly, the story was inspired by a true life story.. from a single high school, it has now elvoved into the "Classroom Dancing" programme across 100 high schools in New York City with over 40+ dance instructors and the programme is being expanded across the United States. Impressive isnt it?

The music score for the movie was decent and though the ending for the movie was highly predictable as the rest of the story is, (your typical uplifting, feel good movie) the overall feel to the show gives you a feeling that isnt boring or expected and with the great dance choreography, it shows a different and seldom seen side of ballroom dancing and talking about the tango... phew... hot!

Take the Lead: 3 popcorns out of 5

turion at 15:34

[180406] Ghost of you and me

Tuesday morning and guess what? Im working later again... my life has evolved from a sleep, surf net, sleep with NPCC in between to work, sleep, work with NPCC squeezed in between. I seriously need a social life but with 2 of my brudders in taiwan (i despite the term, People's Republic of Taipei), it gets kinnda boring during the weekends. Lucky me though, i have WORK to keep me occupied... geez... let's see, im working thurs, fri, sat and most probably all through next week as well... Pay might be coming in next week... finally, after 3 weeks of sloughing i get to see my just rewards!!! ka-ching!!

3 movies were recently added into my MUST watchlist, they are:

1. 13th District - Currently showing
A french futuristic film that features yamasaki (or yamakasi?) eh... the highly acrobatic erm... sport? if you could call it that... darn cool, only cineleisure shows the show... highly entertaining, cathing it perhaps tomorrow.

2. Take the Lead - Currently Showing
A film starring Antonio Banderas, sweetness man... like Sean Connery, Senor Banderas is the very epitome of manhood and suaveness.. he sings (he sang phantom of the opera alongside Sarah Brightman), he dances and he acts... Sweet, Ballroom dancing mixed in with hip-hop... sounds promising...

3. The da vinci code - Opening 18'May'06
Ah.... the holy grail of the movie industry this year... the hit novel by Dan Brown makes its transition from the book into the big screen with the lead character played by in my humble opinions, one of the best male lead actors anywhere - Mr. Tom Hanks. This should make an interesting viewing especially considering the fact that the story was written in such details and the wealth of infomation it generated, how would the directors squeeze all that into a 2hr - 2.5 hr film? and would they be able to avoid the potential pitfall of becoming a flop?? as many book to screen transitions? nahz... cant wait to catch it...

Had trouble sleeping yesterday night, been thinking, tossing and turning again. Oh well, you live by the decisions you have made and you face the subsequent consequences however long it lingers...

What am I supposed to do
With all these blues
Haunting me, everywhere, no matter what I do
Watching the candle flicker out in the evening glow
I cant let go
When will this night be over

I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name for what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

Seen a lot of broken hearts go sailing by
Phantom ships, lost at sea
And one of them is mine
Raising my glass, I sing a toast to the midnight sky
I wonder why
The stars don't seem to guide me

I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name for what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

The ghost of you and me
When will it set me free
I hear the voices call
Following footsteps down the hall
Trying to save what's left of my heart and soul

Watching the candle flicker out in the evening glow
I can't let go
When will the night be over

I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name for what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name for what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

turion at 09:05

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Slow and Steady


Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy.

They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder.

It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment.

They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.



People Envy Your Energy


You've got the drive and determination to keep your life in order, and you are on track to be a huge success.
People tend to envy all you've got in life, but they don't understand the work that goes behind it!



How You Life Your Life


You have a good sense of self control and hate to show weakness.
You are always tactful and diplomatic. You let people down gently.
You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences.
Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.


turion at 10:25

Sunday, April 09, 2006

[090406] The graveyard shift

It's 0314 hrs now, just returned home not long ago from work... been a LOoooooooooooooooonnnnnnnngggggggggg day at work man, i was assigned to indoors (washer) for 3rd day in a row and today being saturday, had more guests as compared to weekdays, endless cycle of washing and replacing glasses. Finished washing one batch, wiped my area clean and dry new batch of stuff to wash comes in... sickening.. haha...

well at least managed to save on the transport back, tcc provides this mini-bus that sends its staff back... just that yishun was the second last stop... lol... went from PS to Serangoon, to Bishan, Toa Payoh, Ang Mo Kio then Yishun.. zzzz man.. lucky still got some of the guys from AT otherwise surely bored to death...

Working tomorrow yet again 1800-2300, closing shift again... been working closing this entire week im working, darn tiring, hate working closing.. so much stuff to clear.. oh well, it's all for the money... My back hurts... cant imagine what it'll be like next thurs, fri and sat when i work closing shift 1800-0130.. hope the outlet wont get slammed... looking forward to next tues and monday! Food Tasting day... wahhaha.... the menu was just changed recently so the staff get to taste all the menu's new items! haha... how to upsell to the guests if we dont know how the food taste like? Getting paid to eat free food, that's life i tell ya, stay tuned for my guide to tcc food gallery ya?

Need to catch some Zs, Damian signing off.

turion at 03:14

Thursday, April 06, 2006

[060406] Frustration's creeping in...

Damn busy day yesterday evening, the crowd just came on coming in waves and to consider we werent full house and yet so darn busy. Lotsa things happened, took orders wrongly, gave wrong orders and it didnt help that the staff stationed at the BAR took forever with the drinks, imagining waiting for over 20 minutes just for your drink? I'll be pissed too...

Kinnda drained yesterday as I did closing, felt so darn frustrated... at the crew at the guests at life in general... so darn packed already and still I had to help with the indoors, im already stationed at alfresco then still gotta help with indoors, come on lah guys, indoors u jaga a bit lahz, i already swamped with orders and requests from outdoors... and the main thing that pissed me off was, Damian, please do this, Damian, please do that, Damian.... Damian.... Damian... fuck lah, no other crew members ah? I know, it's a team effort, but Im already attending to guests' requests or gonna take orders already, you still give me things to settle...

Fuck lah, just because i new, start pushing me around, come on lah, if you guys know Im new, dont expect me to do everything and get it right. Geez, and you were the one that told me to do it in the first place and when i made a mistake, please at least have the decency to understand that it was my first night having such a busy crowd. As I did closing, I must have been in a daze or at least in a very solemn mood, Heikel kept asking if i was ok and was i shagged or why did i seem so tense and uptight. Shagged? hmmm.. abit lah, i've been thru worst while at CBTL. Tense and uptight, understandable from my point of view at least... oh, another thing... as i was wiping the cultery, please at least help out abit lahz, or maybe it's just SOP to clean and wipe as much as possible and leave the rest for opening crew but when seeing i have 3 huge baskets to clean, it would be heartening to know if at least one or two ask or just sat down and helped... instead of walking around and going to change... damn u all...

Met Alvin yesterday, one of the management trainee that only recently left tcc. He seemed to be a very easy going and sincere person. Seemed to be one of those people that would be enjoyable to work alongside and he even helped here and there during the peak period. Cheers mate.

didnt really have a good night's rest... need to rest abit more... 4th straight day of working closing adn supposedly it would be packed tonight as there might be a premier of a movie tonight, geeez, not again?!?? And I wonder what was that "Good Luck" comment suppose to mean, in a sarcastic manner or honestly wishing me luck for the war on saturday night? Im begining to develop a dislike for the senior staff... oh well, feels so much better after venting out over here... but suck it up, F & B's always like that and working life too... oh well... damian checking out.

turion at 09:37

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

[050406] New blogskin... again...

Well, decided to change the blogskin yet again due to the fact that there were some font and colour problems, got frustrated so decided to change to this rain themed skin. The new skin's pretty simple and it's black! haha.. great colour... If there're any problems reading or the colour just holler out on the tag board ya? I'll try to fix it properly...

Just woke up not too long ago, working later at 1800 hrs again, i think im begining to get into the cycle of working closing shifts and stuff... it'll take more adjusting but i think im less nervous now when working afterall, once everything becomes familiar, it becomes a breeze... meeting ke hin and eng siang probably for makan later, too bad i cant go for training later on, forgot about the shift in training days and the management scheduled me for work today... oh well...

Think the weekends are gonna be quite boring these days, monk's off to Taiwan and Blackie as well... only have fox and JJ but fox and JJ have both their respective halves to contend with... hmmm... ah... sadded... boring boring weekends...

turion at 11:19

[050406] Such a pity they're throwing their lives away

Day 2 of work, been ok thus far... the experience has definately been enjoyble, for some reason i cant explain myself, i like to work in the F & B line... I dunno, it gives me great satisfaction and pleasure to serve guests and customers... weird? maybe... but at least i enjoy my work so far... the crew's been great, dun really know them well yet but i think it'll get better as the days and weeks pass...

Still got alot of stuff haven cover yet... Bar, POS (Point of Sales) etc etc, cant imagine when can i find the time to learn and for the management to teach me. Weekdays already quite busy, cant imagine the weekends on fridays and saturdays, gonna fight a war man... reminds me of weekends during my Coffee Bean days, super long queues with tons of orders, hated to be stationed at the Expresso or Ice Blended station, finished one order, turn around to see 6, 7 new orders, never ending man..

The crowd's pretty interesting near Plaza Sing, white collared workers especially and your average joes and janes but quite a mix of interesing people makes life and time passed while working more bearable. Noticed alot of girls smokes these days, when they sit in the alfresco (outside dining area), mmost likely they turn out to be smokers. cant help but feel a tinge of sadness, disappointment and digust... even for guys, smoking's a poor excuse... sighz...

What's up with smoking?? Why throw your lives away?? In war, soldiers turn to smoking to pass time as time to them ticked by slowly and by smoking, it made time pass faster to them at least in a mental state. But we're not in a war, so why smoke? Peer pressure? Looks cool? My bf/gf smokes so i smoke? It feels good? Geez, any reason to smoke is a dumb reason, for every stick they light and smoke, they lose 11 minutes of their life and they increase the likelyhood of heart disease, lung cancer and various other ailments... so why??

I have friends who smoke and with today's standard of education, everyone knows the bad effects of smoking and yet they carry on smoking oblivious to the poison coursing through their veins and lungs. "I cant help it lah" or "Tried quitting but gave up, too hard" are just some of the most common excuses they spit out when questioned with why they smoke when they know that it's bad for their health. Just feel so sad for them cause I know the day will come when their lives will be cut short by cancer or heart attack or any of the ailments related to smoking. It's not a MIGHT, it's a WILL. It's only a matter of time... and when that day comes, I will be saddened for I have lost a friend not to nature's cause but by his/her own doing... we all have to die one day, that's a fact but to go by such a route, it's pathetic... i really pity them...

turion at 00:24

Saturday, April 01, 2006

[310306] Damian Peh estb since 1985

Day 1 after my 21st birthday... a big thank you to those that remembered, especially to win, sham and aini.. thanks gals.. clan forever! But as usual, not much celebrating going on yesterday... no one specific to celebrate with and mum just whipped up a simple mee sua.. it was good mee sua by the way...

My kids helped me celebrate my birthday yesterday during sing-a-long session, that was a pleasant surprise to have the sec1s to NCOs singing the birthday song... an experience indeed, thanks guys... interestingly enough, one of my kids' birthday also on the same day... it's a small world afterall...

was supposed to have a meeting today but last minute cancelled, now nua-ing at home... wonder if the guys got any plans today? if not, i'll just stuff myself silly with Gundam Seed Destiny or WOW... boring boring... im starting work soon, maybe next week? Woo hOOo... money money... $$$

erm.. nothing much i guess, damian out

turion at 11:29

[310306] 祝我生日快乐

我知道伤心不能改变什么 那么 让我诚实一点诚实 难免有不能控制的宣泄只要关上了门 不必理谁
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面 手机 让它休息一夜难 像切歌切掉回忆的画面 眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐 我对自己说 蜡烛点了 寂寞亮了生日快乐 泪也融了 我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切
还爱你 带一点恨 还要时间 才能平衡热恋伤痕 幻灭重生 祝我生日快乐
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面 手机 让它休息一夜难 像切歌切掉回忆的画面 眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐 我对自己说 蜡烛点了 寂寞亮了生日快乐 泪也融了 我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切
还爱你 带一点恨 还要时间 才能平衡热恋伤痕 幻灭重生 祝我生日快乐还爱你 带一点恨 还要时间 才能平衡热恋伤痕 幻灭重生 祝我生日快乐

turion at 11:26