"i am free to be who i really am... no pretenses, no broken promises, no fear... just a life packed with hopelessness and unattainable dreams, 'cause im just livin' like i shld... my life..." everyone has hopes and dreams but dun they know that hope is the denial of reality and that dreams will forever be just dreams?
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Friday, September 29, 2006
[290906] A special friend
Guess it was not meant to be, though I had my doubts I still held on to some fragments of hope... it would be untrue if i said it didnt hurt when i heard those words because it did hurt... but i respect your decision, guess 'WE' stopped existing that fateful day 2 years ago.
wish you all the best, may you find happiness and someone who truly loves you... it's the least you deserve... people always say that your first love or first relationship is the hardest to forget and most memorable... only time will tell if it's the case but i thank you nonetheless for 7 really happy and enjoyable months as short it was...
know that you'll always occupy a soft spot in my heart and i do really care for you... so buss me, ring me or message me if you need anything ya? Yep, guess we'll still be good friends...
080204 - 130904
"A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be herself, to laugh with me but never at me, to cry with me but never because of me, such a relationship is based on absolute trust and can never grow in a jealous heart"
Dido - Thank you
My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why
I got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad
I drank too much last night, got bills to pay,
my head just feels in pain
I missed the bus and there'll be hell today,
I'm late for work again
And even if I'm there, they'll all imply
that I might not last the day
And then you call me and it's not so bad,
it's not so bad and
I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life
Push the door, I'm home at last
and I'm soaking through and through
Then you hand me a towel
and all I see is you And even if my house falls down,
I wouldn't have a clue
Because you're near me and
I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life
Guess it was not meant to be, though I had my doubts I still held on to some fragments of hope... it would be untrue if i said it didnt hurt when i heard those words because it did hurt... but i respect your decision, guess 'WE' stopped existing that fateful day 2 years ago.
wish you all the best, may you find happiness and someone who truly loves you... it's the least you deserve... people always say that your first love or first relationship is the hardest to forget and most memorable... only time will tell if it's the case but i thank you nonetheless for 7 really happy and enjoyable months as short it was...
know that you'll always occupy a soft spot in my heart and i do really care for you... so buss me, ring me or message me if you need anything ya? Yep, guess we'll still be good friends...
080204 - 130904
"A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be herself, to laugh with me but never at me, to cry with me but never because of me, such a relationship is based on absolute trust and can never grow in a jealous heart"
Dido - Thank you
My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why
I got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad
I drank too much last night, got bills to pay,
my head just feels in pain
I missed the bus and there'll be hell today,
I'm late for work again
And even if I'm there, they'll all imply
that I might not last the day
And then you call me and it's not so bad,
it's not so bad and
I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life
Push the door, I'm home at last
and I'm soaking through and through
Then you hand me a towel
and all I see is you And even if my house falls down,
I wouldn't have a clue
Because you're near me and
I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life
Sunday, September 17, 2006
[170906] 1st book out and book in
Boo! some might wonder how come im at home blogging when i enlisted only on tuesday? well, SCDF doesnt practise confinement so 3 days after enlistment, i got to book out... heh.. slack... life as a recruit is well pretty much what all other recruit goes thru, the lowest life forms in any organisation... training's still pretty ok.. though my arms are aching all over even after 2 days of rest...
Im in Aplha Coy and of the 5 companies in BRTC, supposedly we have a reputation to be the best of all in BRTC and not a single day goes by without having our instructors reminding us that we're ALPHA, not bravo, charlie, delta or echo... haha... and im in Aplha Coy, Platoon 1 - Vipers! in a strange twist of fate, when we are at platoon level, our instructors similarly would remind us that we're not Platoon 2 - Dragons or Platoon 3 - Tigers... we're Platoon 1 - Vipers.. so we're expected to be the best Platoon in the best Coy... sweat... haha... so much expectations...
time passes extremely fast when you're a recruit spending his book out days... blink once and poof! it's sunday and book in day... oh well... booked out on friday around noon as it was SCDF day (how lucky for us) and i proceeded for a much needed lunch before i knocked out for the rest of the day... went back to AT yesterday... happened to glance at the roster and was shocked at the amount of part timers we had... all borrowed from CR or OMB or CBJ and had a lot of new PT as well...
Walked around northpoint for a while in cold storage looking for the things i needed to buy... then Blackie called and went to meet him, destination - Causeway Point. Wanted to watch Singapore Dreaming but didnt have the show times that was suitable for us and just proceeded to walk around... followed him as he looked for his street soccer shoes but didnt manage to find one, went next to Lot 1 before deciding that northpoint was still the place to be, true enough he found his stuff at northpoint sportslink..
Thinking of getting a PSP and a new phone as well.. but guess both are nice to haves... but if i were to buy, i dont think i'll buy until at least my recruit life is over and im posted to Station or something.. hmm.. something to ponder over... 11 more hours to book in!
Rec Damian Peh
Alpha Coy/Platoon 1/Bunk5
BRTC
SCDF
Fort Minor - Where'd You Go?
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
She said "Some days I feel like shit,
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,
"I don't understand why you have to always be gone,
I get along but the trips always feel so long,
And, I find myself trying to stay by the phone,
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone,
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,
But when I pick up I don't have much to say,
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
You know the place where you used to live,
Used to barbecue up burgers and ribs,
Used to have a little party every Halloween with candy by the pile,
But now, you only stop by every once and a while,
Shit, I find myself just fillin' my time,
With anything to keep the thought of you from my mind,
I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,
You can call me if you find that you have something to say,
And I'll tell you, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,
For why you're not around, and feeling so useless,
It seems one thing has been true all along,
You don't really know what you've got 'til it's gone,
I guess I've had it with you and your career,
When you come back I won't be here and you can sing it...
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Boo! some might wonder how come im at home blogging when i enlisted only on tuesday? well, SCDF doesnt practise confinement so 3 days after enlistment, i got to book out... heh.. slack... life as a recruit is well pretty much what all other recruit goes thru, the lowest life forms in any organisation... training's still pretty ok.. though my arms are aching all over even after 2 days of rest...
Im in Aplha Coy and of the 5 companies in BRTC, supposedly we have a reputation to be the best of all in BRTC and not a single day goes by without having our instructors reminding us that we're ALPHA, not bravo, charlie, delta or echo... haha... and im in Aplha Coy, Platoon 1 - Vipers! in a strange twist of fate, when we are at platoon level, our instructors similarly would remind us that we're not Platoon 2 - Dragons or Platoon 3 - Tigers... we're Platoon 1 - Vipers.. so we're expected to be the best Platoon in the best Coy... sweat... haha... so much expectations...
time passes extremely fast when you're a recruit spending his book out days... blink once and poof! it's sunday and book in day... oh well... booked out on friday around noon as it was SCDF day (how lucky for us) and i proceeded for a much needed lunch before i knocked out for the rest of the day... went back to AT yesterday... happened to glance at the roster and was shocked at the amount of part timers we had... all borrowed from CR or OMB or CBJ and had a lot of new PT as well...
Walked around northpoint for a while in cold storage looking for the things i needed to buy... then Blackie called and went to meet him, destination - Causeway Point. Wanted to watch Singapore Dreaming but didnt have the show times that was suitable for us and just proceeded to walk around... followed him as he looked for his street soccer shoes but didnt manage to find one, went next to Lot 1 before deciding that northpoint was still the place to be, true enough he found his stuff at northpoint sportslink..
Thinking of getting a PSP and a new phone as well.. but guess both are nice to haves... but if i were to buy, i dont think i'll buy until at least my recruit life is over and im posted to Station or something.. hmm.. something to ponder over... 11 more hours to book in!
Rec Damian Peh
Alpha Coy/Platoon 1/Bunk5
BRTC
SCDF
Fort Minor - Where'd You Go?
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
She said "Some days I feel like shit,
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,
"I don't understand why you have to always be gone,
I get along but the trips always feel so long,
And, I find myself trying to stay by the phone,
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone,
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,
But when I pick up I don't have much to say,
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
You know the place where you used to live,
Used to barbecue up burgers and ribs,
Used to have a little party every Halloween with candy by the pile,
But now, you only stop by every once and a while,
Shit, I find myself just fillin' my time,
With anything to keep the thought of you from my mind,
I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,
You can call me if you find that you have something to say,
And I'll tell you, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,
For why you're not around, and feeling so useless,
It seems one thing has been true all along,
You don't really know what you've got 'til it's gone,
I guess I've had it with you and your career,
When you come back I won't be here and you can sing it...
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Monday, September 11, 2006
[110609] My last 2 days as a civillian
After months of waiting (working more likely) and after what seemed like forever, the time it took me to obtain my diploma... im officially 10 hours + til the beginining of the next phase of my life.. the so called transition from a boy to a man but hasnt that already happened with the onset of puberty or the passing of my 18th or 21st birthday? oh well... the transition like many things are subjective to an individual's opinion.
So a quick summary of the last 2 days of me being a civillian before i hand over my still new IC (i wont see it for 2 years) over for an 11-C, most people would be more familiar with the 11-B, the SAF equivalent so for the Singapore Civil Defence Force, it's the 11-C and for the Singapore Police Force, 11-A... anyways, saturday was spent with the lads from NUFCsg... an all NUFCsg affair as NUFCsg Team A took to the field with NUFCsg Team B, team B being the team with the strongest defenders while naturally Team A was the team with the strongest Attackers... i was in team B though not in the starting eleven... heh... most were shocked to see me in boots and not my usual jeans and casual wear when down at the field supporting the team... think of the match as my testimonial match... since i 'retired' from playing competively for the team... heh.. final score at the end of the day was Team A 3 - 2 Team B... i played for around 20+ mins? but the match had to be stopped minutes into the final third as the lightning streaked across the greyish hued skies... oh well... the weather was darn fine though...
Quickly changed and soon after debrief went with some of the lads to go makan after a extremely 'draining' and 'exhausting' match... then sat around and listened to the old timers and new ones as well trading their NS army stories... most of which i've already listened to before, some depicting the lives as Guards, drivers or Personal Assistant to the OC coming across as something fresh and new... of course, they all offered 'helpful' and 'insightful' advice on how to tackle life during NS... erm.. thanks for the counsel boys, but im heading to Bahar Jalan LOLROFL!!!! (erm... *ahem* sorry inside joke... it's Jalan Bahar by the way, not Bahar Jalan) not P.Tekong but nonetheless thanks for all the advice and well wishes... Reached home and got the news that John met with an accident while on the way to the match and that he was wared in the ICU of Changi Hospital... glad he's stablised now... take good care, wish you a speedy recovery.. ya better get well mate! Terence and me still gotta crash at your crib back in newcastle when we head over there later this year! Ya hear me John Hirst?!
Met up with JJ and redfox around midnight as we helped JJ distribute his flyers for his ERA agent thing... it came as a surprise that he's already ROD... i've thought that he was only clearing his leave and in the mean time starting out as an ERA agent... oh well, at least that cleared up... anyways, helped to distribute flyers to each household in 6 blocks.. finished at around 12+ and headed for supper and rest... after which, a much needed and welcomed visit to my bed beckoned...
Woke up really refreshed and rested for the first time in weeks... usually would have been groggy and aching all over so it was a good start to the day... didnt really do much in my last day... slacked around at home and continuning reading my books and visiting friends' blog... had a sort of a farewell dinner with the family and guess that's pretty much it... really didnt try and party or anything of that sort before i go in... im not that sort of person to begin with... i belong to the goverment from tomorrow onwards after the oath taking.. for the next 2 years, my ass belongs to the goverment (erm, it sounds kindda wrong doesnt it?) oh well at least after almost 8 years, my next 2 will still be under the Home Affairs umbrella... me being in NPCC and all.. and now enlisting in the SCDF... im blue for life!!! (ermz... that also sounded wrong... *shakes head*) unlike most who'll wear the green, sky blue or the whites of the Singapore Armed Forces...
How do i feel?
Sad.
Glad..
Dread...
Curious....
Excited.....
Nervous......
All these emotions rolled into one.. haha.. geez.. oh well... im taking my NS experience to be open and fun.. i hope... go in with an open mind is the key i guess... it's not serve and fuck off, it's an obligation for the right to be a citizen... civillian Damian Peh reporting out...
Recruit Peh's report to follow in 2 weeks...
After months of waiting (working more likely) and after what seemed like forever, the time it took me to obtain my diploma... im officially 10 hours + til the beginining of the next phase of my life.. the so called transition from a boy to a man but hasnt that already happened with the onset of puberty or the passing of my 18th or 21st birthday? oh well... the transition like many things are subjective to an individual's opinion.
So a quick summary of the last 2 days of me being a civillian before i hand over my still new IC (i wont see it for 2 years) over for an 11-C, most people would be more familiar with the 11-B, the SAF equivalent so for the Singapore Civil Defence Force, it's the 11-C and for the Singapore Police Force, 11-A... anyways, saturday was spent with the lads from NUFCsg... an all NUFCsg affair as NUFCsg Team A took to the field with NUFCsg Team B, team B being the team with the strongest defenders while naturally Team A was the team with the strongest Attackers... i was in team B though not in the starting eleven... heh... most were shocked to see me in boots and not my usual jeans and casual wear when down at the field supporting the team... think of the match as my testimonial match... since i 'retired' from playing competively for the team... heh.. final score at the end of the day was Team A 3 - 2 Team B... i played for around 20+ mins? but the match had to be stopped minutes into the final third as the lightning streaked across the greyish hued skies... oh well... the weather was darn fine though...
Quickly changed and soon after debrief went with some of the lads to go makan after a extremely 'draining' and 'exhausting' match... then sat around and listened to the old timers and new ones as well trading their NS army stories... most of which i've already listened to before, some depicting the lives as Guards, drivers or Personal Assistant to the OC coming across as something fresh and new... of course, they all offered 'helpful' and 'insightful' advice on how to tackle life during NS... erm.. thanks for the counsel boys, but im heading to Bahar Jalan LOLROFL!!!! (erm... *ahem* sorry inside joke... it's Jalan Bahar by the way, not Bahar Jalan) not P.Tekong but nonetheless thanks for all the advice and well wishes... Reached home and got the news that John met with an accident while on the way to the match and that he was wared in the ICU of Changi Hospital... glad he's stablised now... take good care, wish you a speedy recovery.. ya better get well mate! Terence and me still gotta crash at your crib back in newcastle when we head over there later this year! Ya hear me John Hirst?!
Met up with JJ and redfox around midnight as we helped JJ distribute his flyers for his ERA agent thing... it came as a surprise that he's already ROD... i've thought that he was only clearing his leave and in the mean time starting out as an ERA agent... oh well, at least that cleared up... anyways, helped to distribute flyers to each household in 6 blocks.. finished at around 12+ and headed for supper and rest... after which, a much needed and welcomed visit to my bed beckoned...
Woke up really refreshed and rested for the first time in weeks... usually would have been groggy and aching all over so it was a good start to the day... didnt really do much in my last day... slacked around at home and continuning reading my books and visiting friends' blog... had a sort of a farewell dinner with the family and guess that's pretty much it... really didnt try and party or anything of that sort before i go in... im not that sort of person to begin with... i belong to the goverment from tomorrow onwards after the oath taking.. for the next 2 years, my ass belongs to the goverment (erm, it sounds kindda wrong doesnt it?) oh well at least after almost 8 years, my next 2 will still be under the Home Affairs umbrella... me being in NPCC and all.. and now enlisting in the SCDF... im blue for life!!! (ermz... that also sounded wrong... *shakes head*) unlike most who'll wear the green, sky blue or the whites of the Singapore Armed Forces...
How do i feel?
Sad.
Glad..
Dread...
Curious....
Excited.....
Nervous......
All these emotions rolled into one.. haha.. geez.. oh well... im taking my NS experience to be open and fun.. i hope... go in with an open mind is the key i guess... it's not serve and fuck off, it's an obligation for the right to be a citizen... civillian Damian Peh reporting out...
Recruit Peh's report to follow in 2 weeks...
[110906] words for you, for us...
Somehow, it seems to me... the conversation we had that august night never occured at all... perhaps i thought too much, assumed too much, hoped for too much and even craved too much... for acceptance, for a chance... a possibility of something that might never be fulfilled...
i admitted that i still missed you after much probing and encouragement from a mutual friend and surprisingly you replied in kind... my spirits soared, my heart fluttered and my hopes raised... wishing and hoping against hope that perhaps a US was possible... i didnt think i would be accepted back at once, that i know at the very least but i was glad at perhaps the mere chance at another shot for a relationship to work out...
Questions were asked back and forth about that faithful september day in school... answers were given, forgiveness was asked for and forgiveness given... further insights into the many months since we went our ways... you asked for time, that i understood and you had someone else in mind... perhaps... but someone who had made you cry on more than a few occasions... you were proud of me you said for i've never made you cry... even when we were together for the short 7 months... our quote: "A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be herself, to laugh with me but never at me; to cry with me but never because of me, such a relationship is based on absolute trust and can never grow in a jealous heart" stands true... You cried once because of me... i know that i've hurt you and for that, i've been haunted by guilt... hurting you was never my intention but i know that any apologies and sorrys of mine will not erase any of the hurt and pain you endured in the past...
i woke up the next day to a sweet sms, i smiled silently... bringing back memories of happier days... the days passed with the odd sms here and there and when time permitted and both of us were free, we chatted online... your nicks while online gave clues to many things, of your thoughts of your current predicament... but one stood out against the rest... "I see him waiting yet i do not go to him, im right here waiting yet he does not come to me" i tried to think nothing of it but it still lingered in my mind... maybe i was just someone to fall back on, a safety net so to speak... might the him that was waiting, was me? i would never know i guess.. it maybe just another random nick or maybe i just think too much...
August came and went along with your birthday... it was nice seeing you again admist your chaotic day as the birthday gal... running here and there entertaining everyone but i was glad to see you as happy as you were enjoying yourself, no doubt you have found a great bunch of friends to be with... september soon came along... you're performing in october... i have no doubt in my mind, you'll perform to the best of your abilities and be magnificent on that night...
You'll be tied down with your preparations for the musical and im enlisting tomorrow... guess both of us will be busy... perhaps it was wrong of me to assume, to hope... perhaps the chapter was already closed.... too many perhaps and IFs... im tired... but silently, im still hoping when perhaps i shouldnt that perhaps, just perhaps... there could still be US...
What do you do when the water runs dry? when your greens and your blues turn into black and white, it's the story of my life ~ Frankie J - Story of my life
I long for the warmth of days gone by, when you were my mine but now those days are memories in time ~ Boyz II Men - 4 seasons of lonliness
Dont wanna try dont wanna try dont wanna try no more, you keep insisting when you know our love is out the door ~ Frankie J - Dont wanna try
let's not wait til the water runs dry, we might watch our whole lives pass us by let's not wait til the water runs dry and make the biggest mistake of our lives dont do it baby ~ Boyz II Men - Water runs dry
Somehow, it seems to me... the conversation we had that august night never occured at all... perhaps i thought too much, assumed too much, hoped for too much and even craved too much... for acceptance, for a chance... a possibility of something that might never be fulfilled...
i admitted that i still missed you after much probing and encouragement from a mutual friend and surprisingly you replied in kind... my spirits soared, my heart fluttered and my hopes raised... wishing and hoping against hope that perhaps a US was possible... i didnt think i would be accepted back at once, that i know at the very least but i was glad at perhaps the mere chance at another shot for a relationship to work out...
Questions were asked back and forth about that faithful september day in school... answers were given, forgiveness was asked for and forgiveness given... further insights into the many months since we went our ways... you asked for time, that i understood and you had someone else in mind... perhaps... but someone who had made you cry on more than a few occasions... you were proud of me you said for i've never made you cry... even when we were together for the short 7 months... our quote: "A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be herself, to laugh with me but never at me; to cry with me but never because of me, such a relationship is based on absolute trust and can never grow in a jealous heart" stands true... You cried once because of me... i know that i've hurt you and for that, i've been haunted by guilt... hurting you was never my intention but i know that any apologies and sorrys of mine will not erase any of the hurt and pain you endured in the past...
i woke up the next day to a sweet sms, i smiled silently... bringing back memories of happier days... the days passed with the odd sms here and there and when time permitted and both of us were free, we chatted online... your nicks while online gave clues to many things, of your thoughts of your current predicament... but one stood out against the rest... "I see him waiting yet i do not go to him, im right here waiting yet he does not come to me" i tried to think nothing of it but it still lingered in my mind... maybe i was just someone to fall back on, a safety net so to speak... might the him that was waiting, was me? i would never know i guess.. it maybe just another random nick or maybe i just think too much...
August came and went along with your birthday... it was nice seeing you again admist your chaotic day as the birthday gal... running here and there entertaining everyone but i was glad to see you as happy as you were enjoying yourself, no doubt you have found a great bunch of friends to be with... september soon came along... you're performing in october... i have no doubt in my mind, you'll perform to the best of your abilities and be magnificent on that night...
You'll be tied down with your preparations for the musical and im enlisting tomorrow... guess both of us will be busy... perhaps it was wrong of me to assume, to hope... perhaps the chapter was already closed.... too many perhaps and IFs... im tired... but silently, im still hoping when perhaps i shouldnt that perhaps, just perhaps... there could still be US...
What do you do when the water runs dry? when your greens and your blues turn into black and white, it's the story of my life ~ Frankie J - Story of my life
I long for the warmth of days gone by, when you were my mine but now those days are memories in time ~ Boyz II Men - 4 seasons of lonliness
Dont wanna try dont wanna try dont wanna try no more, you keep insisting when you know our love is out the door ~ Frankie J - Dont wanna try
let's not wait til the water runs dry, we might watch our whole lives pass us by let's not wait til the water runs dry and make the biggest mistake of our lives dont do it baby ~ Boyz II Men - Water runs dry
Friday, September 08, 2006
[080906] Howay the Lads!!!
Came back from yet another filming of Nokia Football Crazy at ESPN Star Sports Studio, been the 5th or 6th time NUFCsg was featured and personally for me, the 3rd time appearing on the show... why were we invited other than the fact that we have very good contacts with the producer, Sharkee... the other obvious reason was that they were airing the recent Power 98fm battle of the fan clubs and hence it was only appropriate that they asked the Champions to be the fans of the week...
Yep, we've shown it officially that we ARE the best fan club there is, the best fan club there was and the best fan club there ever will be in singapore, in terms of numerical strength, we might lack behind some of the others, namely, the scousers and the scums but in terms of passion, fanaticism and of course love for the club, I dare say we beat any and all others hands down... great job lads! Proud to be one of ya!!!
Anyways, the show is hosted by Andy Panders and most recently co-hosted by Jamie Yeo, yep that Jamie Yeo from growing up and currently a DJ... i've always thought of her as someone very stuck up, bitchy and unfriendly but boy was i wrong.. first impression of her.. darn... she's really pretty... hahaha... not to mention, funny and friendly and when all the lads asked to take turns taking individual pictures with her, she obliged willingly with smiles, a really charming lady... she's like collette wong (Sports presenter at ESPN) who's also extremely pretty, down to earth and charming... 2 thumbs up to Jamie and of course Collette who we managed to bump into just before recording started.. heh..
Jamie Yeo & me!
Came back from yet another filming of Nokia Football Crazy at ESPN Star Sports Studio, been the 5th or 6th time NUFCsg was featured and personally for me, the 3rd time appearing on the show... why were we invited other than the fact that we have very good contacts with the producer, Sharkee... the other obvious reason was that they were airing the recent Power 98fm battle of the fan clubs and hence it was only appropriate that they asked the Champions to be the fans of the week...
Yep, we've shown it officially that we ARE the best fan club there is, the best fan club there was and the best fan club there ever will be in singapore, in terms of numerical strength, we might lack behind some of the others, namely, the scousers and the scums but in terms of passion, fanaticism and of course love for the club, I dare say we beat any and all others hands down... great job lads! Proud to be one of ya!!!
Anyways, the show is hosted by Andy Panders and most recently co-hosted by Jamie Yeo, yep that Jamie Yeo from growing up and currently a DJ... i've always thought of her as someone very stuck up, bitchy and unfriendly but boy was i wrong.. first impression of her.. darn... she's really pretty... hahaha... not to mention, funny and friendly and when all the lads asked to take turns taking individual pictures with her, she obliged willingly with smiles, a really charming lady... she's like collette wong (Sports presenter at ESPN) who's also extremely pretty, down to earth and charming... 2 thumbs up to Jamie and of course Collette who we managed to bump into just before recording started.. heh..
Jamie Yeo & me!
The ever lovely Collette Wong
WE ARE THE GEORDIES! THE GEORDIE BOOT BOYS! FOR WE ARE MENTAL! FOR WE ARE MAD! WE ARE THE LOYALEST OF ALL SUPPORTERS! THE WORLD HAS EVER HAD!
TOON!! TOON!! HOWAY! HOWAY!
Thursday, September 07, 2006
[070906] how my body aches
Ran for the first time since march... it's amazing how once i started work, i almost stopped my daily running... but back to the running... i almost died... lol.. really too long since i ran.. could only keep up with redfox for 3/4 of the route before my legs and mind stopped the pace and i slowly jogged the remainder of the 1/4 way...
and it took me the better part of 30 mins before i started feeling less winded... plus add in the fact that my thighs and calves were extremely tight... almost to the point whereby a sudden movement in the wrong direction would start a cramp... crap man... and im enlisting in like 4 days... lol... shit... never felt so tired before last night.. haha... im weak... NOOooooo!!!! lol...
Met up with JJ, redfox and Sunnymonk for late night supper... as JJ was driving... went down and was surprised that he was driving a subaru impreza, first thought that came into my mind when i sat in the car was Tokyo drift... the teriyaki boyz song started playing in my head... and i strapped on the seatbelt... redfox turned to me asking why i so 'guai', i replied pointing to JJ, cause he's 'safety' driver mahz... anyways, headed to bedok simpang for prata... and most of the time just kept quiet, listening to the guys talk about their future plans and how they were doing... seems that JJ's doing pretty well as a property agent... hopes everything turns out fine brudders...
Enlisting in 5 more days...
Ran for the first time since march... it's amazing how once i started work, i almost stopped my daily running... but back to the running... i almost died... lol.. really too long since i ran.. could only keep up with redfox for 3/4 of the route before my legs and mind stopped the pace and i slowly jogged the remainder of the 1/4 way...
and it took me the better part of 30 mins before i started feeling less winded... plus add in the fact that my thighs and calves were extremely tight... almost to the point whereby a sudden movement in the wrong direction would start a cramp... crap man... and im enlisting in like 4 days... lol... shit... never felt so tired before last night.. haha... im weak... NOOooooo!!!! lol...
Met up with JJ, redfox and Sunnymonk for late night supper... as JJ was driving... went down and was surprised that he was driving a subaru impreza, first thought that came into my mind when i sat in the car was Tokyo drift... the teriyaki boyz song started playing in my head... and i strapped on the seatbelt... redfox turned to me asking why i so 'guai', i replied pointing to JJ, cause he's 'safety' driver mahz... anyways, headed to bedok simpang for prata... and most of the time just kept quiet, listening to the guys talk about their future plans and how they were doing... seems that JJ's doing pretty well as a property agent... hopes everything turns out fine brudders...
Enlisting in 5 more days...
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
[060906] Happy birthday win n LT
First of all, happy birthday win... though u keep on insiting that it's ur 18th birthday... you're 21 already... hahaha... all the best for ur studies, ur relationships and ur life in general... clan rulez... big shout out also to Le Tian, bro from SP days... happy 24th Bday man... wish u all the best and take care man... been listening to Frankie J alot these couple of weeks, his soothing voice plus his heart wrenching lyrics on many of his songs easily won me over.. what can i say? Im a sucker for ballads...
Frankie J - Dont wanna try
(oooo)...don't wanna try don't wanna try (try try)
(oooo)..don't wanna try no more
(ooo)..don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try
i can't believe u had the nerve to say the things u said
they hurt so bad that they ended our relationship
i can't believe it.. 4 years go down the drain
oh how i wish things would of happened so differently
i try'd to save it so many times but you still couldn't see
u kept insistin' and resistin' that u would not fall again
and now u tryin' to tell me that ur sorry
and ur tryin' to come back home
ur tellin' me u really need me crying beggin both knees are on the floor
but baby i
don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
u keep insisting when u know our love is out the door
don't wanna try don't wanna try
cuz all we do is fight and say the things i hurt u bad to when we both begin to cry
don't wanna try don't wanna try i 'bout just had enough its been a rough road baby just let it go don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
tell me whats the use of holdin' on when all we do is hurt our love
u and i had many conversations on the telephone
talks about one day we having a place of our own
wake up in the morning and have breakfast ready on the table
but all of that just seems so far away from me
had to wake up face reality
it all just seem to good to be true after all you put me through
and now u tryin' to tell me that ur sorry and u tryin' to come back home
u tellin' me that u really need me crying beggin both knees are on the floor
but baby i
don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
u keep insisting when u know our love is out the door
don't wanna try don't wanna try
cuz all we do is fight and say the things i hurt u bad to when we both begin to cry
don't wanna try don't wanna try i 'bout just had enough its been a rough road baby just let it go don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
tell me whats the use of holdin' on when all we do is hurt our love
(don't wanna try don't wanna try)
(don't wanna try no more)
(don't wanna try don't wanna try..oo)
(don't wanna try don't wanna try)
(don't wanna try no more)
(don't wanna try dont wanna try don't wanna try no more ooo)
First of all, happy birthday win... though u keep on insiting that it's ur 18th birthday... you're 21 already... hahaha... all the best for ur studies, ur relationships and ur life in general... clan rulez... big shout out also to Le Tian, bro from SP days... happy 24th Bday man... wish u all the best and take care man... been listening to Frankie J alot these couple of weeks, his soothing voice plus his heart wrenching lyrics on many of his songs easily won me over.. what can i say? Im a sucker for ballads...
Frankie J - Dont wanna try
(oooo)...don't wanna try don't wanna try (try try)
(oooo)..don't wanna try no more
(ooo)..don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try
i can't believe u had the nerve to say the things u said
they hurt so bad that they ended our relationship
i can't believe it.. 4 years go down the drain
oh how i wish things would of happened so differently
i try'd to save it so many times but you still couldn't see
u kept insistin' and resistin' that u would not fall again
and now u tryin' to tell me that ur sorry
and ur tryin' to come back home
ur tellin' me u really need me crying beggin both knees are on the floor
but baby i
don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
u keep insisting when u know our love is out the door
don't wanna try don't wanna try
cuz all we do is fight and say the things i hurt u bad to when we both begin to cry
don't wanna try don't wanna try i 'bout just had enough its been a rough road baby just let it go don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
tell me whats the use of holdin' on when all we do is hurt our love
u and i had many conversations on the telephone
talks about one day we having a place of our own
wake up in the morning and have breakfast ready on the table
but all of that just seems so far away from me
had to wake up face reality
it all just seem to good to be true after all you put me through
and now u tryin' to tell me that ur sorry and u tryin' to come back home
u tellin' me that u really need me crying beggin both knees are on the floor
but baby i
don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
u keep insisting when u know our love is out the door
don't wanna try don't wanna try
cuz all we do is fight and say the things i hurt u bad to when we both begin to cry
don't wanna try don't wanna try i 'bout just had enough its been a rough road baby just let it go don't wanna try don't wanna try don't wanna try no more
tell me whats the use of holdin' on when all we do is hurt our love
(don't wanna try don't wanna try)
(don't wanna try no more)
(don't wanna try don't wanna try..oo)
(don't wanna try don't wanna try)
(don't wanna try no more)
(don't wanna try dont wanna try don't wanna try no more ooo)
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
[040906] A mug, 2 cards and many fond memories
Day started off early with me waking up at 1000 hrs even though i slept only at 0200 earlier onwards... somehow my body figures that i had 8 full hours of sleep and poof, i woke up.. anyways, slacked around the house, read abit before heading to the library to return my overdued books... 4 books overdued at the cost of $4.70... shld have just renewed the book and it would have cost me only $2.00.. hmmm.. food for thought in the future...
Previous month's bank statement came in, hmmm.. on first glance looks ok but the summary was kinnda shocking and disappointing... i deposited $X but i withdrew almost 3/4 of $X... shocking... only managed to save abit... even after i cut my expenses (or at least tried to) but guess the birthdays and other misc stuff burned a continous hole in my plan to cut back on expendiature... must save.... dedicate my income into saving...
Headed down to PS Carrefour to try and source out for additional bargain book buys, after spending around 20 mins, came away with 4 books at a mere cost of $14.00, yep... $14.00.. heh... 4 books for $14.00, that's as good as a bargain i can think off and all 4 are still in quite good condition so value for money... not to mention one of them is a dragonlance novel... *drools* i've already started on it and up to date has yet to disappoint... then took a familiar route back up to ground level and walked back to TCC Atrium... still getting used to the fact that i've already stopped working there... but then again, it's been only 2 days since i left so pretty much felt the same... sat down and had myself a complimentarty Citrus Apple Paradise and a slice of Royal Blackforest cake courtesy of Siti and Liyana... heh.. thanks..
Hung around a while while waited for the 2 ladies to finish changing and off we went to decide where to makan... in the end decided to try the Indonesian restraunt at Riverside mall at Clark Quay... Settled down quickly and after browsing thru the menu settled for a combination set b, kang kong belachan and Ayam Goreng Jakarta... the food was soon served and the combination set was darn huge... think of Fish and Co's seafood platter and multiply the size of the serving dish by 3 times... yes, that big... it had BBQ stingray, chilli prawns, chilli sotong and satay... soon tucked in, overall quite a decent meal... the chilli was nice and had a sourish punch to it but kinnda lacked the punch on the spicy scale, the crackers were a nice addition and we proceeded to spend the rest of the time after the meal generally just chatting and talking about things that happened at work or bringing up old and funny moments while working at Atrium...
The guys at work bought me a present and it turned out to be this black ceremic mug that had the words, "Next mood swing 6 minutes" imprinted on it... funny guys, real funny.. but i was grinning away when i saw the mug.. guess my bad tempered days made a real impression on them.. haha.. thanks for the present and the cards and of course for all the memories of working at AT for the past 5 months plus...
Counting down ~ 8 more days to mat land
Day started off early with me waking up at 1000 hrs even though i slept only at 0200 earlier onwards... somehow my body figures that i had 8 full hours of sleep and poof, i woke up.. anyways, slacked around the house, read abit before heading to the library to return my overdued books... 4 books overdued at the cost of $4.70... shld have just renewed the book and it would have cost me only $2.00.. hmmm.. food for thought in the future...
Previous month's bank statement came in, hmmm.. on first glance looks ok but the summary was kinnda shocking and disappointing... i deposited $X but i withdrew almost 3/4 of $X... shocking... only managed to save abit... even after i cut my expenses (or at least tried to) but guess the birthdays and other misc stuff burned a continous hole in my plan to cut back on expendiature... must save.... dedicate my income into saving...
Headed down to PS Carrefour to try and source out for additional bargain book buys, after spending around 20 mins, came away with 4 books at a mere cost of $14.00, yep... $14.00.. heh... 4 books for $14.00, that's as good as a bargain i can think off and all 4 are still in quite good condition so value for money... not to mention one of them is a dragonlance novel... *drools* i've already started on it and up to date has yet to disappoint... then took a familiar route back up to ground level and walked back to TCC Atrium... still getting used to the fact that i've already stopped working there... but then again, it's been only 2 days since i left so pretty much felt the same... sat down and had myself a complimentarty Citrus Apple Paradise and a slice of Royal Blackforest cake courtesy of Siti and Liyana... heh.. thanks..
Hung around a while while waited for the 2 ladies to finish changing and off we went to decide where to makan... in the end decided to try the Indonesian restraunt at Riverside mall at Clark Quay... Settled down quickly and after browsing thru the menu settled for a combination set b, kang kong belachan and Ayam Goreng Jakarta... the food was soon served and the combination set was darn huge... think of Fish and Co's seafood platter and multiply the size of the serving dish by 3 times... yes, that big... it had BBQ stingray, chilli prawns, chilli sotong and satay... soon tucked in, overall quite a decent meal... the chilli was nice and had a sourish punch to it but kinnda lacked the punch on the spicy scale, the crackers were a nice addition and we proceeded to spend the rest of the time after the meal generally just chatting and talking about things that happened at work or bringing up old and funny moments while working at Atrium...
The guys at work bought me a present and it turned out to be this black ceremic mug that had the words, "Next mood swing 6 minutes" imprinted on it... funny guys, real funny.. but i was grinning away when i saw the mug.. guess my bad tempered days made a real impression on them.. haha.. thanks for the present and the cards and of course for all the memories of working at AT for the past 5 months plus...
Counting down ~ 8 more days to mat land
Sunday, September 03, 2006
[030906] An end and the waiting of a new begining
Well, it's finally over... finished my last day at TCC yesterday night... it's amazing how fast time flies, it's been almost 6 months since i started working and poof, bam! I've already stopped work and now counting down til I enlist... The passing of yet another chapter in life and the begining of another one....
Finally managed to catch The Fast & Furious: Tokyo Drift on friday before work... overall, very disappointing storyline and dialogue but i wasnt that disappointed, as i was already pre-warned before hand by friends who had already caught the show.... the main thing was the girls, the cars and the drifting.. ah.. the drifting... only one word to describe it: Orgasmic... what's with guys and fancy cars? Not too sure either but something stirs inside when i see a nice car... encoded into the genes somehow i guess... boys will be boys...
Just came back from walking around town with Blackie while he tried lookin for a hoody... in the end, he ended up with a simple card wallet and decided that the hoody should be for next month's budget... walked around Raffles City, Penisular Plaza, Suntec and M Square before heading to Far East for some turkish food... simple, down to earth Turkish eatery with good food at pretty decent prices, first time having turkish food... so wasnt a bad experience at all... might head back there again next week with the rest of the kakis.... lucky didnt manage to go to COMEX, otherwise i would have had a torrid time in trying to curb myself from splurging on the Zen V: Plus.. grr... must control... right now priority would be to save up...
Basicline is, now have to categorise everything i buy... must haves, good to haves or nice to haves... Music is a must have but i already have a decent MP3 player which fulfills the music requirement in my daily life so guess the Zen V: Plus is a nice to have... so would be a new HP, so Samsung X80 also goes into the nice to have cat... saving up for the future...
Input = stopped
Output = to be controlled
The cycle of life, controlled by one simple thing: Money
Money isnt everything but it helps...
It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good, too, to check up once in a while and make sure that you haven't lost the things that money can't buy. ~George Horace Lorimer
Well, it's finally over... finished my last day at TCC yesterday night... it's amazing how fast time flies, it's been almost 6 months since i started working and poof, bam! I've already stopped work and now counting down til I enlist... The passing of yet another chapter in life and the begining of another one....
Finally managed to catch The Fast & Furious: Tokyo Drift on friday before work... overall, very disappointing storyline and dialogue but i wasnt that disappointed, as i was already pre-warned before hand by friends who had already caught the show.... the main thing was the girls, the cars and the drifting.. ah.. the drifting... only one word to describe it: Orgasmic... what's with guys and fancy cars? Not too sure either but something stirs inside when i see a nice car... encoded into the genes somehow i guess... boys will be boys...
The Fast & Furious: Tokyo Drift - 4 popcorns out of 5 *
*Because of the cars, chicks and drifting
Anyways, caught the trailers of 2 upcoming films which made it into my must watch list, World Trade Centre & The Guardian... WTC, basically is about the events of 9/11 which was inspired by a true story of rescuer who went into ground zero admist the chaos, death and danger. The Guardian seems to be a rip off of Umizaru, a Japanese film about the Japanese Coast Guard Diver, The Guardian is about the US Coast Guard Rescue Diver... both at first glances seem to have roughly similar plotlines about the main character undergoing thru diving training etc etc but the biggest shock was Ashton Kucher was the lead actor *gasps* Ashton Kucher acting? *shakes head* Guess his image on P*unked is too deeply imprinted in the brain, somehow cant seem to shake off his nonsense and MTV persona...Just came back from walking around town with Blackie while he tried lookin for a hoody... in the end, he ended up with a simple card wallet and decided that the hoody should be for next month's budget... walked around Raffles City, Penisular Plaza, Suntec and M Square before heading to Far East for some turkish food... simple, down to earth Turkish eatery with good food at pretty decent prices, first time having turkish food... so wasnt a bad experience at all... might head back there again next week with the rest of the kakis.... lucky didnt manage to go to COMEX, otherwise i would have had a torrid time in trying to curb myself from splurging on the Zen V: Plus.. grr... must control... right now priority would be to save up...
Basicline is, now have to categorise everything i buy... must haves, good to haves or nice to haves... Music is a must have but i already have a decent MP3 player which fulfills the music requirement in my daily life so guess the Zen V: Plus is a nice to have... so would be a new HP, so Samsung X80 also goes into the nice to have cat... saving up for the future...
Input = stopped
Output = to be controlled
The cycle of life, controlled by one simple thing: Money
Money isnt everything but it helps...
It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good, too, to check up once in a while and make sure that you haven't lost the things that money can't buy. ~George Horace Lorimer