damian + turion

[241106] Yet another phase...

It's all over... finally... exactly 10 weeks and a day after i enlisted, i passed out from Basic Rescue Training as a qualified rescuer and got promoted to the rank of private. Somehow, in a strange way... there was no real sense of happiness or joy as i marched out of the parade square during the POP parade...

Strange? Unlike other events like when i passed out as a NCO or a CI, the feeling was vastly different... The feeling was more of a 'oh, yea... pass out liao'... no real sense of excitement... just seemed like another day... draggy and such... woke up early and prepared for the 10km route march.. the march itself was darn boring but what should i expect seeing that most of my company mates arent really bothered, even when i tried to boost and raise morale through songs... but only a few responded, felt quite demotivated during the march itself...

Straight up was the SOC followed immediately by the Passing out Parade... in long 4, with field pack and helmet... feeling was darn weird with the helmet which was 1) uncomfortable 2) hot and 3) darn ugly... i wondered who ever came up with the grand idea that we as recruits should pass out in this manner of attire... seems to contridict the very notion of the grandeur and gracefulness of parades itself...

I got the Company Best recruit and Battalion Best recruit award, kinnda happy that my efforts and performance was acknowledged and recognised but somehow i dun seem to feel much pride in the award itself... perhaps it's due to the fact that i know that in CD, it isnt really hard for one to be outstanding and seem to be performing above the rest when most of the recruits arent really bothered to begin with...

Posting: Rescuer (A COY)

Yep, got posted back to A COY as a rescuer or in other words, got posted back to Alpha Company as an instructor... somehow this entire notion of passing out, the awards and the posting trend seem to carry on... i dun seem to feel any excitement or joy... while others were happily enjoying their day off today, i booked in at 0730 to begin my life as an instructor with the glamourous task of cleaning up the training block... yep.. the glamourous life of an instructor indeed...

Another phase in life is about to begin... one in which i feel the ultimate siansation... life at BRTC as an Instructor.. yet another phase of my NS life... one in which i hope bears fruit... many things to learn, so little time... 18 more days til BRTC Alpha Company 102nd Intake

turion at 22:18

Sunday, November 19, 2006

3 doors down - Here without you

A hundred days had made me older since the last time that
I've saw your pretty face
A thousand lights had made me colder
and I don’t think I can look at this the same

But all the miles had separate
They disappear now when
I’m dreaming of your face

I’m here without you baby
but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight it’s only you and me

The miles just keep rollin
as the people either way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated b
ut I hope that it gets better as we go

I’m here without you baby
but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it’s only you and me

Everything I know,
and anywhere I go it gets hard
but it won’t take away my love
And when the last one falls,
when it’s all said and done it get hard
but it won’t take away my love

I’m here without you baby
but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it’s only you and me

turion at 14:42

Saturday, November 18, 2006

[181106] POP mood

been 2 weeks since i've updated... kinnda lazy to post sometimes i guess... guess all of us tends to suffer from that kind of syndrome at times... the lazy fingers syndrome...

Well the Chemical Agent confidence test 2 weeks back was tiring and fun... indeed, it was a new experience.. the donning of the CA suit with the gas mask and cyclinder... it was extremely hard to breathe for one and of course it's damn suffocating inside the suit as well.. imagining having to forcefully breathe in just to allow air into your lungs and to make things worse was that if you breathe too hard, the whole maks gets plastered onto your face.. many a times, had to fight off the feeling of panic and the urge to rip the mask off the face... the tear gas stings, and it really chokes you really badly... as u try to speak, u start to choke and the tears and the mucous just flows down freely... indeed, an interesting experience indeed...

Final Exercise is finally over, an exercise to test our team work and all that we've learnt through the 7 weeks of Basic Rescue Training... and being appointed Final Exercise IC added to the responsiblity and stress factor of the Final Ex... well, im happy to say that i think overall the platoon did quite well in the final ex though i've overlooked certain aspects of the rescue operations most notably the evacuation of the casualties on the ground level and the fire fighting aspects.. imagining finishing 4 carbon dioxide and 2 water extinguishers and still the fire was burning.. kindda an embarassment for a NSF attached to Civil Defence...

Everything's finally over... SOC, IPPT, Final Ex, REPT, FAT, FFT... only thing left is the actual POP itself on wednesday... really looking forward to the POP itself... and the end of my recruit life at BRTC after which, most probably will be staying on at BRTC as an instructor seeing the hints that the corporals are dropping these days...

POP in 4 more days...

turion at 10:09

Sunday, November 05, 2006

[051106] Wake me up when september ends

I found out that IKEA is really a nice place to just walk around especially when walking around the showrooms on the second floor, the seemingly perfect concept of a bedroom, a kitchen or a dining room with an endless amount of different types and kinds of furniture to accomadate even the fussiest of people. I finally found my computer chair and it costs alot less than what i had been eyeing from Hives... it's black in colour (what other colour would u expect it to be?) and it's reasonably comfy... there were more comfy ones but the steep price of over $500 was really out of my budget... best thing i guess was the price, a reasonable $98 add into account the cabfare home would add up to $113, i got a shock when they told me that delivery would cost an additional $40, erm.. thanks but no thanks, i'd rather take the cab anyday...

walked around Queensway shopping centre as well looking for jersies but not having much luck in locating jersies from past seasons guess i gotta depend on ebay or yahoo! auctions already... but i dont really like the idea of getting something 2nd hand especially when i have no guarantees that it would be in good conditions but the availability and afforable prices kindda evens out everything...

This week in camp passed quite quickly, no major cock ups... not much anwways... had my REPT test... 4 stations in total... but i only managed to obtain 1st class rankings for 3 of them. i only managed to get a 2nd class ranking for my airbag station cause of a stupid knob that i overlooked in my haste to obtain the 1st class ranking... kinnda wasted and kinnda disappointed as well... but what to do... worst of all was that the PC allowed those that obtained 1st class for all stations to book out before lunch.. lucky Henri and Goh... didnt have to go thru the shit that we did in the evenings before we book out.. oh well, just take it as additional training to 'keep fit'

Chemical Agent innoculation test is coming up this week.. kinnda nervous and excited all at the same time... wonder how i'll handle when i come into contact with the tear gas... would i crumble or would i be mentally strong enough to endure? Of course, my body would have a natural reaction to the gas... uncontrolled tearing, mucous dripping, drooling even but whether or not i'll be able to handle the entire exercise is another thing... the time old cliche of "mind over body" comes into mind... it is but yet another cliche...

Got shortlisted for the post of instructor, went for a simple, informal interview with the CSM... kinnda in a dilema now, im not really keen on the post as the working hours and pay arent really that fabulous and the prospect of being an Ambulance Attendant seems to be more exciting and promising yet i hear conflicting views from my instructors... a case of reverse physcology? hmmm.. hard to say.. but our postings are orders so if i am posted to BRTC Aplha Coy as an instructor, so be it... what will be, will be... be water my friend, formless, shapeless... LLST

2 more weeks to POP...

Craig David - Unbelievable

Always said I would know where to find love,
Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough,
But some times I just felt I could give up.
But you came and changed my whole world now,
I'm somewhere I've never been before. N
ow I see, what love means.

It's so unbelievable,
And I don't want to let it go,
Something so beautiful,
Flowing down like a waterfall.
I feel like you've always been,
Forever a part of me.
And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love,
Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.

In my heart, in my head, it's so clear now,
Hold my hand you've got nothing to fear now,
I was lost and you've rescued me some how-.
I'm alive, I'm in love you complete me,
And I've never been here before.
Now I see, what love means.

It's so unbelievable,
And I don't want to let it go,
Something so beautiful,
Flowing down like a waterfall.
I feel like you've always been,
Forever a part of me.
And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love,
Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.

When I think of what I have,
and this chance I nearly lost,
I cant help but break down, and cry.

Ohh yeah, break down and cry.

It's so unbelievable,
And I don't want to let it go,
Something so beautiful,
Flowing down like a waterfall.
I feel like you've always been,
Forever a part of me.
And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love,
Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.

Now I see, what love means

turion at 11:32

Yesterday's memories

My past